April 8, 2010
Hobson’s choice
\’häb-senz-‘chois\ n : an apparently free choice when there is no real alternative*
In fifth grade, we had a class pet. His name was Patches and he was a tri-colored guinea pig. As all young kids do, I thought he was the cutest thing and I couldn’t wait for my turn to take him home. Little did I know that weekend would be a catastrophe. Let’s just say gerbils and Barbie cars don’t mix.
Everything was going well so far. We (ok, my mom) diligently cleaned out his cage, we (alright alright, that was my mom too) fed him and I petted him. I even played with him and thought it would definitely be cool if Patches was the first ever guinea pig to take a ride on top of my brand new Barbie convertible. Patches got stuck, became sick and died a few days later…I think it’s safe to say my delicate reputation had been permanently tainted among my peers.
A few days later, after being tormented relentlessly by the kids in my class, and one boy in particular, I came back from recess to find a note in my desk. It was from the kid behind me who always teased me. The note stated that he was sorry he blamed me for killing Patches and that even though he still believed it was my fault, it wasn’t (three words: fifth grader’s logic). I later found out he had been presented with a Hobson’s choice of either apologizing to me or losing recess for the rest of the year. Three words – fifth grader’s motive.
*letter “e” is upside down creating sound of “uh”
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3 comments:
I think it is safe to say that he would not have been the only one if presented with the same choice.
I am glad to see that you have stayed away from toy cars and pets. Thank you for the memory(one of your best from childhood).
thanks chicken!
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